Tuesday, May 10, 2011

all roads lead to Rome

I glanced in my rearview mirror and there must have been at least ten cars behind me, all with flashing red turn signals all of us going to the same place, church, and for some reason I  always get directed to the side parking lot.  While the lot attendants flag every else to the front lot I always get flagged to the side lot, up the little hill into what looks like a makeshift overflow gravel parking lot, which means I have to use the furthest side door and walk through the entire church, past the chapel, the prayer room, a few conference rooms, a few bathrooms,  the nursery aaand the coffee bar to get to the sanctuary. It is a work out and I really the think the church owes me a new pair of sneakers and walking stick as they are getting a bit worn out  from the miles of terrain I cover every Sunday morning.

For the longest time I had a hard time believing that God could ever use me, I have made a lot of mistakes, some I have shared in this blog others too shameful to even talk about and for now will remain between me and God, but trust me I have made some doozy of mistakes.  In fact, so many mistakes that I thought I had exceeded my quota and I am now past the point of no return, God cannot use me.  I have wondered why He had let me soldier on in the vat of my own sin for so long, don’t mistake me He has been with me my entire life, He had been chasing me my entire life, but He never bullied His way in He just stood quietly on sidelines, knowing that one day I would come to Him and He would use the road I have traveled for the good.

 God has been hard at work in my life this past year, changing my heart and using that vat of sin I was filling up faster than a bartender mixing drinks at happy hour, for His glory. I have recently gotten involved with the student ministry at my church, trust me I was more than a little surprised by this, me and other peoples kids, well not so much, but I am loving it.  I have recently decided to go back to college to become a teacher, my dream is to teach children in underdeveloped countries, and to someday teach girls who have been rescued from sexual slavery to give them a chance at life, maybe even explore adoption. 

God has changed my heart to want to sow into these young girls lives to not walk the same road I did because I know the devastation it causes and I know what it is like to unravel the damage other people have done. 

All roads to lead to Rome, if you let Him take you there, but sometimes that road may take you past the chapel the prayer room the conference rooms, bathrooms aaand the coffee bar before you can reach the sanctuary. It is not so much the mistakes you have made but what you do with them, are you going to let God use the mistakes of your past and use them for His future glory?

You may not be able to see it now, but we serve an all knowing God, He knows what is coming down the pipeline.  Perhaps there is someone out there that is walking the same stretch of road you did at one time, and perhaps He has you in mind for the job of walking them through the journey of healing and sowing the seed of hope in their life.

Think God can’t use you?  Think again, God changes the world through people like you.


  1. Love it!!! I had to laugh at the picture of you walking a l l that way to the sanctuary. :) But you made a great point - God uses our journeys to grow us and prepare us. And more than likely there is someone out there that is walking that same road that needs us to come along side of them. God can and will use us if we let Him. I'm so glad God brought you into my life. Many blessings!

  2. Great goals Kandi! So glad to hear you are serving with the youth! And, any walk that takes you by the coffee bar cant be THAT bad ;)

  3. Kandi, what an awesom comparison. God uses us no matter what we have done. I am so glad to hear you are planning on going back to school to teach. There are plenty out there that will be able to us your compassion. I know you will do an awesome job. You have decided to allow God to guide you in your life and that is what it is all about. When He guides us there is no way we can go wrong, maybe a couple of rough spots we cause ourselves but where the path of God leads us is a great one. Love your post and blessings to you, Kandi.

  4. I love all the imagery you used...somehow a vat of sin just makes me think of something smelly and disgusting bubbling away...love the vision He has put on your heart and that you are seeing pieces start to come together. Keep moving in the right direction...that is awesome!